The Best Parenting Quotes

This is just kind of a short easy list of quotes and some comments from my experiences. Some are serious parenting quotes, some are funny parenting quotes and some are deep parenting quotes. Plus, who doesn’t love quotes about something they know well or love? So chill out and enjoy. 

If I´m being completely honest, I´m just really burned out from researching and writing. Work has been full and there was a list a mile long to get done. I had spent tons of hours on my Benefits of Being a ParentBenefits of Family Vacations and the Should Kids have Cellphones posts. I had A LOT of research and reading of terribly boring studies for all three of them. So let´s get started with some sweet and humorous stuff. You would be a monster if you hated that. 

¨We never know the love of a parent until we become one¨ 
 Henry Ward Beecher 

Sweet, true, cute, it´s exactly what I like in a quote. You appreciate even more all of the things your parents did for you.  

¨90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again¨ 
 Betsy Farrell 

This is one of those ¨clever because it´s true¨ ones. The only thing that I complain about when it comes to being a parent is that it´s never quiet and I´m almost always tired. 

“Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.” 
 Ray Romano 

He nailed it. You know that ¨this is why we can´t have nice things¨ cliché? Yeah, because it seems that some small, emotional drunk is wondering around speaking in a foreign language. 

¨Children spell love…T-I-M-E¨ 
– Dr. A Witham 

I am my son´s favorite person because of how much we play and how much I try to spend time with him. He doesn’t understand that I provide for him and take care of him. All he understands is playing and cuddling when he needs love, is sleepy or gets hurt. 

“Before I got married I had six theories about raising children; now, I have six children and no theories.”  
 John Wilmot 

That is all what we all think buddy. I had a lot of ideas of how I was going to parent and almost all of them have gone out the window. 

“If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?” 
– Milton Berle 

The most important thing to remember about evolution is that it´s not what would be best, it´s what works. Quick little science lesson for you guys.  

“If I had my child to raise all over again, I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later. I’d finger-paint more, and point the finger less. I would do less correcting and more connecting. I’d take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes. I’d take more hikes and fly more kites. I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play. I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars. I’d do more hugging and less tugging.“  
 Diane Loomans 

This is a parenting quote to live by. We can get so caught up in life that we forget how much we are impacting and forming our kids until it´s too late. They aren’t the same as us and just don’t understand anything. A lot of people on their death bed saying ¨I wish I spent more time with my children.¨ There are not many that say ¨I wish I was at work more and watched more YouTube.¨ 

“A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.” 
 Jerry Seinfeld 

You´ve got to love Jerry Seinfeld, he sees the world in a unique way.  

“Don’t worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you.” 
 Robert Fulghum 

OOOOOOHHH, this one almost gave me chills. I absolutely hate how true it is. 

“A child can teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason, to always be busy with something, and to know how to demand with all his might that which he desires.”  
 Paulo Coelho 

I know it sounds crazy, but I have wanted a few attributes that my son has. I REALLY wish I had his energy! I told someone recently when I saw him get so excited about something small ¨I don´t think I have been that happy about anything in the last 15 years.¨ 

“When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.”  
 Erma Bombeck 

The desire to hide is incredibly strong sometimes. I love my two-year-old and have a lot of fun with him, but sometimes… 

“I think it’s necessary to let kids get bored once in a while—that’s how they learn to be creative.”  
 Kim Raver 

I am the worst about this. If he gets bored, he gets destructive. So I do what any good millennial does – give him my phone and put on Cocomellon or Katie Cutie to distract him. I know a lot of my blog is about childhood development, but I´m not perfect.  

¨Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.¨ 
– Charles R Swindoll 

This is another one that is slightly terrifying. To add to that, they don’t have as many memories taking up space in their memory banks. If you have a bad day, what you do with it could make their day a really bad day. 

¨When I tell my kids I’ll do something in a minute, what I’m really saying is “Please forget.” 

But they never forget, do they, do they? Unless, of course, it is something that you need for them to remember. 

“Treat a child as though he already is the person he’s capable of becoming.”  
– Haim Ginot 

This is so true! I am quickly becoming aware of how a child will become a self-fulfilled prophecy. In fact, this will likely become a future post. You are the same way, you just might not know it. I won´t get into the study right now but it is 100% accurate. 

¨Recipe for Iced Coffee 

1. Have kids 

2. Make coffee 

3. Forget you made coffee 

4. Drink it cold¨ 
– @toni_hammer 

Ah, the crazy things that you forget as a parent. Like most things in life, this is terribly ironic – when you get to a point that remembering becomes more important, you forget more. I think it is the same mechanism that gives you a zit on a day that you need to look your best. 

“The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable”  
– Lane Ollinghouse 

I don’t know how to stress my love for this quote. I also think that I may genuinely try this trick. I can see it now: He´s drawing on the wall and start telling him to stop. While he inevitably doesn’t stop, I’ll say ¨Fine, I’m going to watch some tv.¨ He will scream ¨NNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!¨ and run after me. Genius!! 

So I stepped away for like two seconds…” the beginning of a parenting horror story 
– Mary Kathrine Backstorm 

This is the beginning of at least 80% of the stories I tell people. I´m glad to hear that this is other people´s experience and I´m not a terrible parent. You learn quickly that if you´re alone with the kids, you wont go the the bathroom alone for an uncomfortable amount of time. Then after that, you can´t do it without someone banging on the door. 

“I’ve been building my son’s trust for two years with high-fives. Today I’m going to hit him with a ‘too slow.’ Welcome to the real world, son.”  
– Trevor Williams 

I actually laughed out loud when I read this. It may be the best introduction to what life will become for them. I´m not sure why the idea of emotionally torturing a kid was so funny to me, but we try to be honest on this website.  

 “Usually the triumph of my day is, you know, everybody making it to the potty.”  
– Julia Roberts 

We’re in the middle of potty training at the moment. I cannot wait until that successful day. I may literally float on a cloud when he accomplishes that task that he hates for some unknown reason. 

¨Wife on Facebook: ¨Spent the day with the kids. We had so much fun!¨ 

 Wife to me: ¨Do you know what those little brats did to me today?” 
– Anonymous 

People never understand that Facebook is the worst representation of reality. If your life doesn’t look like someone´s life on Facebook, don’t worry, neither does theirs. 

I hope that you all got to enjoy a small break. Please, let me know in the comment section if you have any favorite parenting quotes. 

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